AtTituDe!

To date, I’ve yet to meet someone who can really make my heart beats again.
I’m lost. I’m numb. Been ‘dead’ since 1st April’08.
I’m not sure if I still know how to love. Or maybe I dare not love.
For the fear of hurt & pain terrifies me, badly.
I’m afraid of losing. I hate it.
I dare not commit.
No guy has yet able to ensure me that I can place my heart safely with him.
I’m treading the path very carefully now. even afraid of taking big steps or hasten my speed.
I’m skeptical to anyone that confessed their liking for me.
Why? Why me? I asked.
None has yet to give me THE answer.
I’m not looking for any specific words or sweet nothings.
But rather, something / someone that can touched me and moved me to tears.
I’ve not cry for a long long time for I’ve lost senses / feelings associated with LOVE.
I can be smiling, laughing or seems to be enjoying myself.
But deep down, does anyone really know how I feel? I seriously doubt so.
More often than not, I chose to close myself in my own world.
Refusing to let any strangers to even peek into it.
I’ve been hurt. Badly wounded that time hasn’t been able to heal me completely.
Maybe one of these days, I’ll meet someone that can make my heart throbs again.
Then again, maybe not.